Escape to Chicago: O'Hare's Closest Red Roof Inn!
Escape to Chicago: O'Hare's Closest Red Roof Inn! - A (Mostly) Unvarnished Review
Alright, folks, let's be honest, you ain't expecting the Ritz when you book a Red Roof Inn near O'Hare. You're expecting… well, proximity to the airport, a place to crash after a red-eye, maybe a free continental breakfast that tastes kinda… manufactured. And, in that regard, this place delivers. But hold on, because this ain't just a dry recitation of amenities; this is a journey. This is me, sleep-deprived and fueled by instant coffee, laying it all down.
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Accessibility: The First Hurdle (and a potential sigh)
Okay, so first things first. Accessibility. They claim to be set up for it. Facilities for disabled guests is listed. The website says elevator. Great! But let's face it, in my own experiences, saying and doing are two different things. I didn’t need super specific accessibility, thank God, but I always look out for it. Was the elevator actually accessible? Seemed to be. Were the hallways wide enough? Probably. I couldn't fully assess this without specific need, but the mention is there, which is a decent starting point. (Still, future guests with specific needs, call and double-check! Seriously, don't assume.)
Cleanliness and Safety (The Pandemic Edition - Shudder):
Alright, let's talk COVID, because, let’s face it, it's still a thing. I’m more paranoid than I'd like to admit. “Anti-viral cleaning products?” - Music to my germaphobe ears! The website boasts a whole damn laundry list: Daily disinfection in common areas, hand sanitizer, room sanitization between stays. They even say staff is trained in safety protocol. I’m feeling a little better… but is it actually accurate? I'm skeptical by nature . I didn't see anyone scrubbing the hallways with a hazmat suit on, but the public areas seemed reasonably clean. My room? Well…I wasn't about to lick the walls. Let's just say it was… acceptable. I’m giving it a cautious thumbs-up.
The Room: My Lair of Tiredness (and Free Wi-Fi!)
The room itself was… well, a room. Air conditioning roared – a little too loudly. Blackout curtains — bless those things. I'm a light sleeper, and they were essential. Free Wi-fi in all rooms! Yes! Wi-Fi [free] is another win. I needed to upload ALL the photos and catch up on emails before passing out. Free bottled water. Nice touch. Desk, laptop workspace? Yep. All the basics were there. And the hair dryer actually worked (unlike some of the travel hotel nightmares I've had). Desk and Coffee/tea maker. I'll take it.
Important note: The TV worked. This is a small miracle in some hotels.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking (The Quest for Sustenance):
This is where the Red Roof Inn experience veers into the realm of… pedestrian. Breakfast [buffet]? Yes, but calling it a “buffet” is a stretch. Let’s call it a “continental-ish breakfast with questionable pastries.” Think pre-packaged everything. Coffee was weak and the juice was… not fresh. Coffee/tea in restaurant and a Coffee shop option would have been great. There was a snack bar, with the usual vending machine suspects. Room service [24-hour]? Nope. Restaurants: There were no Restaurants, but there might have been some food delivery apps.
Services and Conveniences: The Airport Shuffle
Airport transfer? Yes! Thank goodness. (Though getting picked up on time was an adventure in itself. I'll get to that later.) Cash withdrawal wasn't available. Concierge? Nope. Daily housekeeping was there. Laundry service and Dry cleaning? Sadly, yes. Luggage storage: I assume yes. Car park [free of charge]? YES! Crucial for those airport runs.
Things to Do, Ways to Relax (LOL):
Listen, this isn’t a spa resort. There is no Spa, Massage, Pool with view or Sauna. Fitness center and gym/fitness: None. This is all about the bare essentials. They do not provide all the amenities to relax or enjoy your stay. The "things to do" is escape to Chicago.
Getting Around: The Airport Tango
Getting to the airport (and back) is the primary mission here. The airport transfer service is… well, it exists. Here's the thing: when you're running late for a flight, every minute feels like an eternity. The scheduled pick-up time? Yeah, that's more of a suggestion. I ended up pacing like a caged tiger in the lobby, watching the clock, and fighting the urge to just call an Uber. When the shuttle finally arrived, it was packed to the gills.
Stuff They Didn't Mention (But I Noticed):
- The Parking Lot's Charm: The parking lot, while free, is like a concrete jungle, which is where you should go, parking and walking to the hotel
- The Noise Factor: The hotel is close to the airport so expect Airplane noises
My Verdict: The Bottom Line (and Why I Might Stay Again):
Look, this isn’t the place you’d book for a romantic getaway or a luxurious spa retreat. It’s a functional hotel. It serves a purpose. For a quick overnight layover, or if you're mainly interested in proximity to O'Hare, it's totally fine. The free Wi-Fi, that free parking, and the fact that it’s (relatively) clean and offers basic amenities make it a decent option.
Escape to Paradise: JW Marriott Grande Lakes Orlando Luxury Awaits
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because we're plunging headfirst into a Red Roof Inn adventure in the heart (or rather, the periphery) of Chicago! This isn't your pristine, filter-worthy Insta-trip. This is real-life, with all its questionable decisions and unexpected joys.
The Great Red Roof Inn O'Hare Odyssey: A Messy, Beautiful Disaster
Day 1: Arrival of the Clumsy Tourist (and the Terrible Coffee)
- 1:00 PM: Touchdown at O'Hare. Okay, so the flight was delayed. Again. Because apparently, the universe hates me getting anywhere on time. I'm convinced I'm personally responsible for at least three cancelled flights per year. Grabbed my ridiculously overpriced airport sandwich (turkey, because I tell myself I'm healthy), and found the dreaded shuttle to the Red Roof Inn Chicago-O'Hare Airport/ Arlington Hts. The shuttle driver, bless his soul, looked like he'd seen a thousand lost souls just like me.
- 2:00 PM: Check-in. The lobby… well, it’s Red Roof Inn. You know the drill. Functional. Clean-ish. The key card barely works. I swear, those things are programmed to fail in the worst possible moments. The woman at the desk had the weary air of someone who'd dealt with my kind – the perpetually frazzled traveler – all day.
- 2:30 PM: Room Reconnaissance. Oh, the room! Standard. Two double beds, a TV from the Stone Age, the faint aroma of cleaning products and… something else. Something slightly… off. I’m pretty sure there was a vague, unidentifiable stain on the carpet I'm choosing to ignore.
- 3:00 PM: Coffee Catastrophe: The hotel coffee is so bad… I mean, truly abysmal. I took one sip and nearly needed a defibrillator. It tasted like disappointment and regret. I managed to choke down a few more ounces before running out to the vending machine for something.
- 4:00 PM: A Stroll Around The hotel, which is about 30 minutes. I think I spent about 40 minutes finding the hotel is rather big.
- 5:00 - 8:00 PM: Dinner and Recovery. Dinner was some bland, overpriced comfort food at a local chain because after the coffee, it was the only thing that seemed right.. After that I just relaxed.
Day 2: Chicago Bound (Mostly, a Little Bit)
- 8:00 AM: Attempts at Breakfast (Part Two): Okay, I'd learned my lesson. No coffee. I decided to be all healthy with an apple and a stale muffin from the hotel's grab-and-go breakfast station. The apple was mealy. The muffin… well, let's just say it provided little joy
- 9:00 AM: Public transportation! I made my way to the nearest L train station. The ride. It involved a lot of me staring, hoping I wasn’t on the wrong train. (Spoiler alert: I was for a bit.)
- 10:30 AM: Chicago! I stepped out of the train in the city, and promptly got turned around. The streets started to look more and more alike. I wanted to see Millennium Park, but Google Maps decided to quit.
- 11:30 AM: Lunch. Okay, so now the hunger is real (and the coffee withdrawal headache is kicking in). Found a random diner. I was hoping for a greasy spoon, a real Chicago experience. It was alright, but it was also just fine.
- 1:00 PM: More Sightseeing Snafus. I actually made it to The Bean! Took photos, and got a little excited. Then, disaster struck. I dropped my phone, cracked the screen. I stood there in front of the sculpture, suddenly more concerned with my broken phone than the pretty, shiny bean.
- 3:00 PM: I was so defeated, I decided to head back to the hotel. I ordered a pizza (because, Chicago) and spent most of the evening wallowing in the mediocrity of the day, trying to forget my phone.
- 7:00 PM: Pizza arrives. It was… alright. You know, the kind you eat out of obligation more than enjoyment.
Day 3: The Airport Awakening (And the Redemption of the Vending Machine)
- 8:00 AM: No breakfast. I decided to avoid the food altogether.
- 9:00 AM: Check-Out. Farewell, Red Roof Inn! You gave me the bare minimum of comfort and a whole lot of memories.
- 10:00 AM: Back to O'Hare. Waiting for the flight. I decide to take the plunge and get a coffee. It was an improvement.
- 11:00 AM: The Vending Machine Rescue. I found the airport vending machine and the perfect snack – a bag of weirdly delicious spicy chips. I'd almost had a good day, so I grabbed another bag, and another one for the plane.
Reflections:
This trip wasn't perfect. Far from it. There were mishaps, frustrations, and a surprising amount of mediocre coffee. But, it was real. It was a reminder that travel is messy, and that half the fun is in the chaos. Also, next time, I'm bringing my own coffee and a backup phone. And maybe a better sense of direction.
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Escape to Chicago: O'Hare's Closest Red Roof Inn! - The Unfiltered FAQ
Is this Red Roof Inn REALLY the closest?? C'mon, spill!
Alright, alright, let's get this out of the way. THE closest? Maybe. Depends on your definition of "closest." I'd say, it's *definitely* in the running. It's practically spitting distance from O'Hare, which is the *only* reason I ended up there last time. Delayed flight from hell, you know the drill. My luggage got routed to *Timbuktu* (exaggerating, but felt like it!), and all I wanted was a bed that wasn't a hard airport bench. So, yeah, within shouting distance of the airport madness. Trust me, after a 10-hour flight delay, "practically spitting distance" sounds like a freaking miracle. You can *almost* smell the jet fuel from the parking lot. (Spoiler alert: You *do* occasionally smell the jet fuel.)
Okay, proximity to the airport is good. But…what about the *smell*? You mentioned jet fuel…
Look, let's be real. Red Roof Inns… they're not luxury stays, alright? You're not gonna sniff out the fancy aromatherapy diffusers. The air freshener situation runs the gamut. Sometimes it smells of that *distinctive* Red Roof Inn "clean," which is a scent I've come to associate with both relief *and* mild trepidation. Other times… well, sometimes the previous occupant might have left a more… *personal* scent. And yes, sometimes, you *do* get that jet fuel wafting in on the breeze. It's part of the charm! (Kidding. Usually.) I had one stay – the first I ever did there actually – where a room literally smelled like… well, I *think* it was someone cooking a curry. Honestly, it was kind of delicious. Wish I could have had some.
The rooms. What are they *really* like? Don't sugarcoat it!
Okay, deep breath. Rooms. They're… adequate. Think: Functional. Clean-ish (always check the bedspread, always!). Slightly dated. You're not gonna find a king-sized bed with a pillow menu. You *might* find a slightly stained carpet. But honestly after the aforementioned flight delays...who cares? I've seen much, much worse. The TV usually works. The shower usually has hot water. And the important thing? There's a bed. And, a lot of the time (thankfully), they're actually quite comfortable. Now, one time I was there, and the remote control was... missing the battery cover. I *swear* I spent a good twenty minutes trying to jam a pen into the battery compartment. Finally gave up. First world problems, I know, but that remote situation REALLY bugged me. Also, I think I saw a rogue spider once. But, it didn't bother me and honestly, it was probably more relieved it was there than I was.
What about the breakfast? Is it… edible?
Breakfast... ah, the ultimate test. Look, this is not a gourmet experience. Don't expect artisanal sourdough. You're getting the standard Red Roof Inn breakfast experience--probably some instant oatmeal, a vending machine of questionable muffins (beware the suspiciously bright-green ones!), and maybe some sad-looking bagels that have been there all morning. Coffee is usually… well, it's caffeinated, which is what really matters. Sometimes there are those little pre-packaged breakfast bars. And the best thing? They are always, always, always out of the goddamn *yogurt*. One recent time, I made a beeline for the yogurt. And boom! No yogurt. Left me in a total breakfast funk. All that being said, you might actually be pleasantly surprised. I've had worse, much, much worse.
Is it noisy? I need my sleep!
Okay, noise. This is a legitimate concern. You're near a major airport. That equals: planes, planes, and more planes. Sometimes the planes are loud. Sometimes they *shake the building*. (Exaggerating slightly, but close.) Road noise is also a thing. Then, of course, you've got the internal noises. People coming and going. Doors slamming. (That’s a big one.) I pack earplugs. Necessity. Also, on one occasion, I had a *very* loud snorer in the next room. I could practically feel the vibrations through the wall. Needed more than earplugs for that. Seriously consider asking for a room on the opposite side of the building from the road and the runway.
Any tips for surviving the Red Roof Inn experience?
Okay, survival tips. Number one: Lower your expectations. Number two: pack earplugs. Number three: Check the bedspread for… stuff. Number four: bring your own coffee (or, you know, just accept the hotel coffee's fate). Number five: Be nice to the staff. They deal with a *lot*. They're usually pretty friendly, and a little kindness goes a long way. And number six: Remember why you're there. You're likely stranded, exhausted, or both. It's a place to crash. That's it. Don't expect the Ritz, and you'll probably be alright. Also, I once met the most amazing guy in the elevator there too. So don't knock it 'til you try it. The whole thing is an adventure, really.
Would you stay again? Be honest!
Look, if I'm stranded at O'Hare and my flight's been cancelled, or I have an early morning departure? Absolutely. Without hesitation. It’s convenient. It's usually cheap. And it's better than the airport floor. And trust me, I have slept on many airport floors and let me tell you, the Red Roof Inn is superior. Would I choose it for a romantic getaway? Absolutely not. Would I recommend it as a destination in itself? Hell no. But as a place to rest my weary head when I'm in travel hell? Hell yes!
Okay, you seem to be leaning towards a yes. What's your *best* memory from there?
Alright, this is a good one. I was absolutely zonked. Had a 14-hour layover. Needed sleep. Checked in. Room was… well, see previous answers. But the AC was blasting, and after a long, miserable flight, that was allLocal Hotel Tips
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