Escape to Detroit: Southgate's BEST La Quinta Inn Deal!
Escape to Detroit: Southgate's BEST La Quinta Inn Deal! (Or Maybe Not…) - A Messy, Honest Review
Alright, buckle up buttercups, 'cause we're diving headfirst into my recent experience at the La Quinta Inn & Suites in Southgate, Michigan. They’re calling it the “BEST” deal, and honestly? Well, we'll see about that. I'm not one for flowery prose, but I am one for honesty, and this review is gonna be just that – a sprawling, sometimes illogical, probably slightly caffeinated stream-of-consciousness about my time there.
First Impressions & My Wheelchair Woes (Accessibility, and Oh Boy…):
So, I booked this place hoping for a relaxing weekend. You know, a little Detroit escape. Immediately, I was checking for Accessibility because I’m, well, wheelchair-bound. And La Quinta, like many hotels, says they're accessible. But let me tell you, "accessible" often translates to "barely functional for anyone using a wheelchair."
The first hurdle? The entrance. Sure, there's a ramp, but it's steeper than my mortgage payment! My poor arms; I was already regretting not bringing my power chair. I managed, sweating like a pig in a sauna (which, spoiler alert, the La Quinta does have – kind of… more on that later).
The elevator, thank goodness, worked! But the hallways? Narrow. Very narrow. It's like they designed it for toddlers on scooters. Getting past the cleaning carts felt like an Olympic sport. And let's talk about the bathroom, okay? The grab bars were there, technically. But the space? Not exactly a ballroom. I felt like I was doing a contortionist act just to turn around. And don't even get me started on the showerhead… it sprayed water straight into my face. Like, seriously, La Quinta? Did you test this thing on anyone?
Internet – Thank God for the Small Mercies (Internet Access, Wi-Fi, etc.)
Okay, here's where La Quinta got things right. Free Wi-Fi in All Rooms! and frankly, it was a lifesaver. The Internet access was fast and reliable, which, considering the other accessibility issues, I’m actually very grateful for. I needed the Internet [LAN], because I have this complicated work set up… and the ability to connect? Smooth. No complaints there. Bless you, La Quinta, for the internet.
Things to Do & Ways to Relax – Does the Spa Exist?! (Gym/Fitness, Spa/Sauna, Swimming Pool [Outdoor]…)
So, in my quest to unwind, I saw they touted a Fitness center. I peeked in… and let’s just say, it wasn't exactly the swankiest gym I've seen. A treadmill, a couple of ancient-looking weights, and a lot of dust. I'd say, use the weights with caution, you know? The sauna? Listed. Hmmmm. Let's just say, it looked more like a small, slightly humid closet. The swimming pool [outdoor]? Closed for the season. Sigh. Massages or other spa services were not on offer.
Cleanliness & Safety – Antibacterial Spray is Your Friend!
Okay, I'm a bit of a germaphobe. Call it a post-pandemic thing. The hotel says they follow rigorous cleaning protocols. They boast about using Anti-viral cleaning products and doing Daily disinfection in common areas. Honestly, I found it… well, adequate. I saw cleaning staff, but I wouldn’t say the place was sparkling. I brought my own spray. Just do it. I did.
Dining, Drinking, Snacking – Breakfast: A Buffet of Disappointment (Breakfast [Buffet], Restaurants, Coffee/Tea Maker)
This is where things went downhill, faster than me trying to navigate that ramp. They offered a Breakfast [buffet]. Keyword: offered. The options? Let's just say it was your classic continental fare, but with a sad, slightly stale, vibe. Coffee/tea? Yes, but tasted like dishwater. The Buffet in restaurant was a letdown. There was even this Breakfast takeaway service… but who wants to eat that outside the room? There wasn't a Restaurant per se, at least that I saw. Nor a Poolside bar… just saying.
Services & Conveniences – Mostly Convenient, Apart From…
Daily housekeeping? Check. Concierge? Nope, not that I could tell. Front desk [24-hour]? They were there, always smiling, which I appreciate. A Convenience store? Nope. Free Car park [on-site]? Yep. (Thank God there are not many cars parked)
The Air conditioning in the room was a blessing; I was getting hot and bothered about the ramp. The Elevator worked (thank the cosmos)…. But the lack of a Business center might be an issue if you need to print or fax anything. I sure did.
For the Kids – Babysitting, Really?
Look, I don't have kids, so I didn't investigate. But the fact they mention Babysitting services is… interesting. Is this La Quinta a wild party zone, or what?
Available in All Rooms – The Bare Essentials (Air conditioning, Coffee/tea maker, Wi-Fi [free], etc.)
The Air conditioning worked like a charm. The Coffee/tea maker was there… but, see above, drink at your own risk. The Wi-Fi [free] was my savior. Everything else was okay… nothing spectacular, nothing terrible.
Getting Around – Car in the Driveway, Please! (Car park [free of charge], Airport transfer, Taxi service)
You need a car here. Seriously. Southgate isn’t exactly a pedestrian paradise. Car park [free of charge] – absolutely. Airport transfer? Nope. Taxi service? I didn't try, but I doubt it's easy to find one.
My Verdict – A Cautious "Meh"
So, did I escape to Detroit's "BEST" La Quinta Inn? Maybe. It was adequate, but you get what you pay for. I won't deny it was cheap, but the accessibility issues are a deal-breaker for me. If you're not in a wheelchair and you just need a place to crash, this might be alright. Is it the "BEST" deal? I'm not convinced. It was okay for the price. I'd give it a… a 2.5 out of five stars.
SEO & Metadata Summary (Because Apparently, I Need to Think About This, Too):
- Keywords: La Quinta Inn Southgate, Detroit, Accessibility, Wheelchair Accessible, Hotel Review, Cheap Hotel, Michigan Hotels, Free Wi-Fi, Breakfast, Fitness Center, Spa, Cleanliness, Safety, Budget Hotel
- Meta Description: A brutally honest, messy, and often hilarious review of my stay at the La Quinta Inn & Suites Southgate, Michigan. Wheelchair accessibility, internet woes, breakfast disappointments, and the quest for relaxation – all laid bare!
- Category: Travel, Hotels & Accommodation, Detroit
- Target Audience: Budget travelers, people with disabilities, anyone looking for an honest hotel review.
- Focus: Accessibility, Wi-Fi, Cleanliness, Breakfast, Overall Experience
- Note: I was trying to be funny and a bit critical in this review. It's not perfect.
- Metadata: Meta-description, keywords for search engines.
- Tags: #LaQuinta #Southgate #Detroit #HotelReview #Accessibility #BudgetTravel #Michigan #HonestReview #Wi-Fi #Breakfast #Fitness #Spa
Basically, don't expect too much. And if you're in a wheelchair? Call ahead and double-check everything. And bring your own spray. Seriously. You have been warned.
Kamloops Getaway: Unbelievable Deals at Super 8 by Wyndham!
Okay, alright, buckle up buttercups. Because this ain't your grandma's tidy travel itinerary. We're diving headfirst into the glorious, messy reality of a stay at the La Quinta Inn by Wyndham in Southgate, Michigan. And let me tell you, it's gonna be… something.
The La Quinta Lowdown (Detroit Southgate Edition): A Chronicle of Existential Dread and Random Taco Bell Runs
Day 1: Arrival and the Unveiling of the Beige Abyss
1:00 PM - 1:30 PM: Arrival and the "Welcome to Elegance" Experience.
- Okay, so I pull up, slightly frazzled from the drive (traffic? In Detroit? Shocking, I know). The La Quinta. It’s… beige. Like, all beige. Beige walls, beige carpet, beige everything. It’s like staring into the void, but the void is politely asking if you want a loyalty card. The front desk guy, bless his heart, looked like he'd seen some things. Probably a lot of beige things. He gave me a keycard that felt like it was made of recycled sadness.
- Anecdote Alert! I swear, the elevator took three minutes to arrive. Three whole minutes. I started wondering if it had a secret mission, or maybe was stuck in a time loop reliving the same excruciating elevator music.
1:30 PM - 2:00 PM: The Room Reveal (and the Slight Panic That Ensues).
- The room itself? Predictable. Clean-ish. The air conditioning, though, sounded like a dying walrus. Seriously. Every time it kicked on, I braced myself for a full-scale aquatic tragedy. The view? Uh… another building. And a parking lot. Optimism is hard when you're looking at parking lots.
- Emotional Reaction: A wave of that distinct travel-induced existential dread washed over me. Will I ever truly be happy? Will I ever find the perfect shade of beige?
2:00 PM - 3:00 PM: The Settling In (or, the Quest for WiFi and Sanity).
- First order of business? WiFi. Because, let's be real, without it, I’m basically a cave dweller. After wrestling with the password (which, of course, involved typing in a series of numbers and letters that felt like a secret government code), I finally connected. Now, I can doom-scroll in peace!
3:00 PM - 4:00 PM: The Southgate Reconnaissance Mission (and the Taco Bell Temptation).
- Time to venture out! I peeked out the window. It was a blistering day. I started to sweat just looking at it. And then, there it was, across the street. A beacon of hope. A siren call to my stomach. A Taco Bell.
- Quirky observation/Rambling The lure of the fast food was palpable. I wrestled my inner health nut. It was too tempting. The Crunchwrap Supreme was calling. I decided to take the plunge. The guilt would come later.
4:00 PM - 5:00 PM: Taco Bell Triumph and The Quiet Return.
- Crunchwrap Supreme and Baja Blast in hand, I felt like I could conquer the world. Returning to my Beige Fortress, I contemplated what the future held.
5:00 PM - 6:00 PM: Rest and Recalibration.
- I spent the next hour lying on my bed. It turned out the sheets were surprisingly soft. Maybe this wasn't going to be so bad. I started to feel a little like I could get used to this…
6:00 PM - 8:00 PM: Dinner and the Evening’s Entertainment.
- I started to think about what was for dinner. I decided to just order in. Chinese food was on the menu, but I felt conflicted. The choices were overwhelming. Should I just venture out once again? I don't know. The idea of leaving the safe embrace of my room just felt wrong… and also, exhausting.
8:00 PM - 10:00 PM: Bedtime.
- I decided to give up fighting and just go to sleep. I dozed off right away.
Day 2: The Quest for Breakfast, and the Dreadful Check-Out.
- 8:00 AM - 9:00 AM: The Breakfast Debacle (and the Search for Edible Food).
- Breakfast time! I peeked out of my room, dreading the "complimentary breakfast." I walked into the dining room, and was met with a scene of mild chaos. A lukewarm waffle maker, a sad-looking pile of pre-packaged pastries, and suspiciously orange juice. Emotional Reaction: My stomach turned slightly. This was going to be harder than I thought. Coffee, the only saving grace.
- 9:00 AM - 10:00 AM: Final Preparations- Check out Time.
- I packed my stuff up and headed out the door. It was time to say my final goodbye.
- 10:00 AM: Check Out
- I handed in my key and went out the door. The whole thing felt a little bittersweet. Sure, the La Quinta had its flaws, but it was also a place to live for a small period of time.
- Opinionated Language: Overall, it wasn't the best hotel experience. It was beige. There was the awful walrus-like air conditioning. The breakfast was an insult. But it was mine, for a little while. And maybe, just maybe, that's what mattered. And besides, that Taco Bell was amazing.
Beyond This Point:
- This itinerary is, of course, incredibly subjective. Your experience may vary. You may find unexpected joy in the beige. You may become best friends with the front desk guy. You may discover a hidden gem of a restaurant nearby. You might even find a new appreciation for lukewarm waffles. The world is full of possibilities.
- Enjoy your trip, whatever it may be! And remember, the messier the better.
(Disclaimer: This itinerary is purely fictional and intended for comedic purposes. Please consume responsibly.)
Gettysburg's BEST Kept Secret: Super 8 Wyndham Review (You WON'T Believe This!)
Escape to Detroit: Southgate's BEST La Quinta Inn Deal! ... or Is It? Let's Figure This Mess Out.
Okay, Seriously, What's the "Deal"? Is it REALLY the BEST La Quinta Inn in Southgate?
Alright, alright, let's get this straight. "BEST"? That's a *loaded* word, isn't it? I mean, "best" compared to what? A hotel where the ghosts change the sheets? Because honestly, La Quinta...it's a La Quinta. You know the drill. Free breakfast, slightly suspect coffee, a pool that’s probably seen better days. But the *deal*? That's where things get interesting. They're usually running some sort of special. I remember one time, I booked it for a last-minute trip to see my Aunt Mildred and was practically *begging* for something cheap. Found this La Quinta, the rates were crazy low, and I thought, "Score!"
So, is it the best? Depends. Best *value*? Possibly. Best *experience*? Maybe if you're really, really tired and just need a place to crash before hitting up the Ford Rouge Plant. Don't go expecting the Ritz. Expect *La Quinta*. And potentially a weird smell in the hallway. I swear, every. single. La Quinta has a unique, undefinable hotel smell. It's like a mix of chlorine, stale air freshener, and… well, let's just say it’s an experience.
But yeah, the deal is usually pretty sweet, especially if you're not picky. (And come on, who IS picky anymore?)
Speaking of the Pool...Is the Pool Actually Swim-able? Or Should I Just Bring Hand Sanitizer?
The pool...Ahhh, the pool. Okay, let’s be honest, the pool is a gamble. A *slightly* chlorinated gamble. I've seen it looking pristine, all shimmering and inviting. And then I've seen it...eh, let's just say it looked like it hadn't been cleaned since the late 90s. I'm not even joking.
My advice? Scope it out *first*. Like, really *look* at it before you commit. Check for floating things. And by "floating things," I mean anything that shouldn't be there. A stray rubber duck? Probably fine. A discarded flip-flop? Eh, proceed with caution. A suspicious looking brown layer on the bottom? RUN. Bring hand sanitizer regardless, though. It's always a good idea, just in case. And maybe pack some goggles. And a hazmat suit. Kidding! (Mostly.)
I remember this one time, I went with my kids (big mistake, but I was on a budget). They spotted the pool and immediately demanded we go swimming. I checked it out, and it was... questionable. I tried to dissuade them, but the siren song of the lukewarm water was too strong. They got in, and emerged looking like they’d aged a decade. It was definitely a lesson learned. Always be prepared for the worst.
The Breakfast. Let's be Real. Is it Edible, or Just Free?
Free. That’s the magic word, isn’t it? The breakfast. The *La Quinta Breakfast*. Look, I am not a food critic. I’m not a snob. I’ve eaten questionable gas station sushi at 3 AM. So, "edible?" Yes. Mostly. "Gourmet?" Absolutely not.
Expect the usual suspects: waffles (if the machine is working, *fingers crossed*), questionable pastries that may or may not be a day past their prime (but hey, they’re free!), some kind of lukewarm scrambled egg situation, maybe some sausage that’s seen better days, cereal, toast… the works. Remember, you are not at a brunch buffet.
Here's how I approach the breakfast: Lower your expectations. Load up on carbs. And for the love of all that is holy, *try* the waffles. Sometimes, the waffle machine is actually a win. And if they have those little individual yogurt cups? Grab a few. You can always hide them in your bag for later. I mean, what else is free?
What's the Deal with the Parking? Is it a Nightmare?
Oh, the parking. Ah, yes. The parking. It's usually... okay. It depends. Like, during the week, it should be fine. Weekends? Could be a crapshoot. I've definitely circled the lot more than a few times, muttering under my breath like a loon.
I once went in on a Saturday, and it was a MESS. There were cars parked everywhere. People double-parked. People parked on the grass. It was a full-blown parking apocalypse. I actually saw a fist fight break out over a space. I couldn’t believe it. I thought, "This is NOT how I pictured my weekend getaway!" Finally, after about fifteen agonizing minutes, I snagged a spot that was (questionably) close enough to the entrance. Seriously, bring your patience and maybe a good audiobook.
My advice? Try to arrive early. Or, you know, just park a block away and walk. That might be easier than dealing with the parking chaos. And if you see a fist fight? Stay away. Just... stay away.
Okay, Okay, Let's Address the Elephant in the Room: The Location. Is Southgate a Good Base for Exploring Detroit?
Alright, let's be real. Southgate…it's not exactly *in* the heart of Detroit. It’s a suburb. A perfectly fine suburb, mind you, but you're going to be doing some driving. Traffic can be a beast, especially during rush hour. Southgate is basically a comfy, slightly boring launching pad.
The plus side? You can probably find some decent chain restaurants nearby. There’s probably a strip mall or two. It's safe. It's relatively quiet. The immediate area around the La Quinta isn't known for its vibrant nightlife. It's more like, "Go to bed early, catch the sunrise at the gas station, and start your day".
If you're planning on spending most of your time downtown, like visiting the art museum or checking out the Riverwalk, expect a bit of a commute. You'll be driving into Detroit, which is doable, but factor in the time. It's a trade-off. You get a potentially cheaper room, you get a slightly less exciting location. It's up to you. Though, the last time I was there, I spent an hour and a half in traffic. I should have just stayed home. That's a whole different kind of 'best deal'!
Is There Anything *Actually* Good About This La Quinta? Like, One Redeeming Quality?
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